Spork or Foon?

Grilled Pork Tenderloin with Pear, Potato and Bacon Salad and a Rosemary Mayonnaise

 
 

This is yet another recipe that I am revisiting from a page in the history of Spork or Foon?  The last time I wrote about this recipe, back in April of 2009, I discussed the friendly cooking competition that took place between Jack and myself.  Jack was an incredible cook. He was the reason I started cooking. But I never wanted to admit to Jack that sometimes his dishes were, in fact, better than mine for two reasons: 1. he's likely to rub it in a lot and 2. I'm a big baby. 

Well, since April of 2009, Jack has completely stopped cooking.  His reason, he states, is because "Why would I cook when I have a girlfriend who cooks everything perfectly?" 

First of all, I don't cook everything perfectly. I make mistakes. I'm human.  And if people tell me the food is good, I don't believe them.

But it is nice to hear.

Jack has gone so far in his self-imposed cooking strike that he doesn't even help me prep food anymore.

"Hey, Jack can you chop this onion for me?"

"I don't know how."

So. Ridiculous.

So when I was searching my archives for a meal to prepare for dinner and came across the aforementioned blog post, I had to chuckle to myself.  And I wonder, what do I like more?  Not being told that I come in 2nd place in this household or not having someone help me chop an onion.

It is a question for the ages. 

At least this dish is as good as ever.  I actually forgot how good it was.  It is another Top Chef Recipe, this time by Dale of Season 3.  It features a deliciously moist pork tenderloin perched atop a salad of roasted potatoes, crisp haricot verts, diced onions quickly cooked in red wine vinegar and a bit of sugar to give it a wonderful, almost-pickled flavor, sweet and tender pears and bacon. Sweet, sweet bacon. And of course, the incredible rosemary mayonnaise flavored with woody rosemary, soy sauce, and delicate honey that adds the perfect finish to an already wonderful dish.

Grilled Pork Tenderloin - from Top Chef

Grilled Pork Tenderloin with Pear:

2 pork tenderloins, silver skin removed

2 pears, peeled, diced

2T butter

Salt and pepper to taste

Potato & Bacon Salad:

1 lb new potatoes, cubed (in water until use)

4T extra-virgin olive oil

Salt and pepper to taste

1/4 lb haricot vert, blanched, shocked

1 red onion, diced small

1/2 cup red wine vinegar

1/4 cup sugar

8 slices bacon, cooked to crisp

3T sherry vinegar

Rosemary Vinaigrette:

2 egg yolks

1/4 cup sherry vinegar

1T Dijon

1 cup grapeseed oil

1/4 cup rosemary (ground in spice grinder)

2t soy sauce

1t honey

Salt and pepper to taste

Potato & Bacon Salad:

Toss potatoes in olive oil, salt and pepper. Roast at 450 degrees until golden but not overcooked, about 1 hour. Cut blanched and shocked haricots into bite-sized-pieces. Place diced red onion in nonreactive pot with red wine vinegar and sugar; bring to boil and remove. Let cool and strain. Cook bacon until very crispy and drain on paper towels. 

Rosemary Mayonnaise:

Place yolks, vinegar and Dijon in blender. Slowly drizzle in oil until thick. Add in other ingredients and season to taste with remaining ingredients.  (If you want, you can use pre-made mayonnaise and just add rosemary, honey, and soy sauce).

Pork:

Grill pork until done, about 2-3 minutes on each side, depending on size of the tenderloin.  Saute pears in butter until golden brown, about 2 minutes. Season with Salt and Pepper.

To Serve:

- Season pork tenderloins and grill until desired doneness. 

- In a large bowl, toss roasted potatoes, haricot verts, onions, bacon and pears with sherry vinegar.  If it has cooled, heat up potato salad. 

- Top with slices of pork and rosemary mayonnaise.

Tuesdays with Top Chef with Teanna... er... Season 6? Duo of Mushrooms, Smoked Kale, Candied Garlic and Turnip Purée

 

Please excuse my while I try to unfry my brain.  I have to switch up TWD and Top Chef with Teanna this week, as I didn't realize how time consuming this dish would be.  So my tart will be posted tomorrow when my pastry cream is all nice and chilled.

This Top Chef recipe one was quite a doozy.

Yes. I said doozy. I can't think of any other words.

Not only was it is a doozy, but it is among my Top 5 Favorite Top Chef Recipes to date.  Ah, Kevin Gillespie, you and your pig tattoo get me every time.

I have fallen back a bit on my Top Chef blogging, so please, let me give a short description about the episode.  Natalie Portman, the vegetarian and totally adorable actress, was the guest judge.  The episode was full of laughs and very uncomfortable innuendos about pricks and mouths and honestly, I had to leave the room because I was so uncomfortable... and I was watching this alone.

The chef's were cooking at Tom Colicchio's Craft Steakhouse.  But here is the twist: Natalie is a vegetarian.

Dum, dum, duuuuuum.

Many chefs are known for their vigorous dislike of vegetarians.  Don't even get them started on vegans. Anthony Bourdain once called vegans the "Hezbollah-like splinter factions of vegetarians" and said that vegetarians are "the enemy of everything good and decent in the human spirit, and an affront to all I stand for, the pure enjoyment of food."

He is never one to mince words, is he?

But I digress. On to the dish.  This dish is composed of six components (is that redundant?) - braised mushrooms, sauteed mushrooms, roasted turnips, turnip puree, garlic syrup, a pistou, and sauteed kale. I am a bit worn out from lack of sleep these past few weeks, so I'm going to break it down for you the best I can.

I could not find hen of the woods or morels, so instead, I bought a dried pack of wild mushrooms. I know. I'm awful. But you know what, when seasoned and sauteed properly, you may probably never know the difference.  At least I couldn't.  I was pressed for time, and frankly, good produce is hard to come by in NYC so I take what I can get.  These mushrooms were delicious. I didn't follow the recipe to the letter. I just threw them in a pan with the emulsified butter and oil, tossed them with some diced celery, seasoned well and added a bit of lemon and heavy cream.  Heaven on a plate.

I was never one for liking turnips, but this is the second dish in which Kevin has proved me wrong on that point. The turnip puree was buttery, rich, and provided a wonderful textural contrast to the dish. The smells that wafted through the air while the sliced turnips were cooking butter while quartered turnips were roasting in butter was pure heaven. It could just be the butter, though.

The pistou was good, but be sure to season it well (as you should will all components of this dish.  Use your judgement.).  I could have done without it on the dish, but if you love the flavors of tarragon and parsley (which I do), it adds a nice lightness to an otherwise heavy dish.

The garlic syrup was fantastic.  I have tried a different recipe for garlic syrup before this and it is nice to see the different ways in which you can make this fabulous accoutrement which adds so much flavor to any dish.  One note: never stick your nose over a pot of boiling vinegar. You'll regret it.

The kale.  Oooooh, the kale. I could eat this component of the dish for days and days.  I am probably like most people who believe that kale can suck when it is not cooked properly.  I know you are intimidated by my mature use of language, right there.  It can be bitter and chewy and no one likes bitter and chewy. But this kale was the most amazing preparation of kale I have ever tried.  I used liquid smoke (again, right up there with dried mushrooms. I apologize) and sauteed it in water with diced onion, garlic, I then added 1/2 teaspoon sugar and salt each to season it. Pure perfection.  Again, I could not stop eating this.

Together, everything was outstanding. I can completely see why the judges not only picked this as the winner, but stated that they didn't even miss having a protein on the plate. This is a dish that would make me go veg in no time.

ToSorry, Anthony Bourdain.

Click here for the recipe.  But again, this one is time consuming. It took me about 3 hours to make... but it was well worth the effort.

 

Top Chef with Teanna - Season Six, Episode 9, Part 2 - Pressed Chicken with Calamari Noodles

I have to keep this one short and sweet - Jack and I are moving (AGAIN) this week to our permanent apartment! 

Here is the winning restaurant wars dish from restaurant Revolt(ing). Michael Voltaggio made a Pressed Chicken with Calamari Noodles.

Let's talk about the brilliance that is Michael Voltaggio. Michael is so brilliant, that in this past Wednesday's episode, his dish prompted Natalie Portman to ask "Who is his dealer and is he accepting new clients?" Toby Young is kicking himself for not thinking of something so witty. 

But that is an episode that I will discuss with next week's dish. And there is a lot to discuss... like the uncomfortable innuendos that were being thrown around the table about a prick. It was... odd.

Here's what I changed:  You know with any Voltaggio dish, you're going to be doing some crazy stuff.  Like putting frozen calamari steaks through a meat press.  I couldn't find calamari steaks, so I just got the largest pieces of calamari that I could find and cut them into noodles with a pairing knife.  No freezing required. Secondly, I do not have an immersion circulator, so I just poached the chicken in 2 cups of chicken stock, extra garlic and thyme, and added a lemon slice to really bring out the flavor.  I then followed the rest of the instructions for the chicken by pressing a large frying pan on top of them and then crisping the skin when they were ready to serve.

The broth was delicious and reminded me a lot of the Cardamom Tomato broth that Kevin and Jennifer made in a previous episode.  Michael's broth wasn't as sweet, as there was no sugar, but the sweet, licorice flavor of fennel and the citrusy lemongrass added the perfect flavor profile to this dish. 

Although the recipe is challenging, it is definitely adaptable to the home kitchen if you put your mind to it.  Click herehttp://www.bravotv.com/foodies/recipes/pressed-chicken-with-calamari-noodles-tomato-confit-and-fennel-salad for the recipe. 

Oh, and here is a real picture of the other dish that Kevin and Jennifer made a few weeks back.  I had to replace the crappy iPhone photo.

Top Chef with Teanna - Season Six, Episode 9, Part 1 - Pear Pithivier

Finally the time has come for the beloved Top Chef restaurant wars.  This is the point in the season where the top 8 chefs form two teams and build a restaurant empire for an evening to impress the judges. Or, in this case, the Top 5 or (arguably) 6 chefs pair up with two chefs that make you wonder why they weren't eliminated weeks ago leaving room for much more talented chefs to create dishes in the kitchen. 

Luckily, one of said chefs did prepare the most popular dish of the evening: this pear pithivier.  Yes, the controversial, inferiority-complex suffering Robin prepared this fantastical (yes, fantastical) dessert.  Now, I don't mean to be mean about Robin. But we all know that Robin doesn't belong there anymore. Robin knows she doesn't belong there which is why I say she suffers from an inferiority complex: because her knowledge of the fact that she shouldn't be there constantly has her being over defensive and snappy. Although I'd snap Michael Voltaggio's finger off if he ever stuck it in my face the way he did hers after she cursed at him. But his arrogance is another story that can be seen in the hilarious montage of an interview where Michael talks about his level-headedness and leadership skills in the kitchen interspersed with clips of Michael being an annoying, obnoxious, cocky pain-in-the-ass. But he is a damn talented annoying, cocky, pain-in-the-ass, and for that, I cannot be mad at him. 

I did make the dish that Michael made that won him the challenge - Pressed Chicken with Calamari Noodles - which was amazing and I will post Wednesday, but I have to say, this dish was the star of the dinner.  

I had actually made homemade puff pastry for the first time from scratch and have yet to blog about it. I will shortly, but I'll just say that making puff pastry from scratch reminds me why I should never eat puff pastry: because it will turn my body into a butter factory. As in, I'll be a giant stick of Land O'Lakes walking the streets of Manhattan.  But this dessert made me forget all of that.  A delicious, intensely almond frangiapane is given a little kick by adding crystallized ginger and is layered with thinly sliced, butter- poached pears and enrobed in a light and flaky puff pastry crust. It is served with "intense vanilla ice cream" (I just thought it was funny that Eli described the ice cream as "intense") and a crisp almond brittle. Robin served this dish with an Elderflower syrup, but since I don't have any access to elderflower syrup, I made some homemade caramel and infused it with some rose water. The rich caramel worked perfectly with the light, rose-flavored water and was a perfect finish to the dish. 

Maybe Robin does deserve to be there after all.

No. No. I don't think so.  But this gives her a gold star in my book. 

Click here for the recipe.

Top Chef with Teanna - Season 6, Episode 8 - Pork Leg Pate

HOLLA!

I'm back! With a shiny new camera!  I am the proud new owner of a Nikon D3000, which is basically the replacement camera for the now defunct Nikon D40, but sounds so much cooler because there are more 0's in the name. 

But I am in love.  I don't know much about cameras, but I do know that it is faster, takes better photos in less light, and IS NOT BROKEN, which was the problem with my last camera. 

On another note, I swear I'll be a better blogger. I haven't been consistent, I haven't been keeping in touch with my favorite bloggers, I haven't been on Twitter, and I miss the community! When things calm down a bit, I'll be back with a vengeance! For now, I still love everyone so much! 

But on to bigger and better things.  Mainly, Kevin Gillespie and Pork. This week's challenge had the cheftestants cooking pork for the famed Charlie Palmer.  And of course, the winner of the challenge was Kevin, who is not only extremely talented, but in love with the other white meat - so much so that he has a pork tattoo adorning his arm, which he happily showed the judges.  Luckily, it wasn't adorning another part of his body (because, frankly, if you're going to have a tattoo of a pig, you may as well go all out and get it tattooed on your backside).

This has to be one of the easiest Top Chef recipes I have tried to date.  The ingredients only cost me about $15 for 1/3 of the recipe for the pork, star anise, mushrooms, cherries, and heavy cream. I only ended up getting ground pork instead of pork and fat back (um?) and had to get canned cherries instead of fresh.  Additionally, I subbed almond flour for hazelnut flour, because that is what I had on hand. I learned that quatre epices is a spice mix used mainly in France and the Middle East, but is just a fancy way of saying "2 tablespoons ground black pepper, or a combination of 1/2 tablespoon white and 2-1/2 tablespoons black pepper, 2 tablespoons ground cloves, 2 tablespoons ground nutmeg, 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon." 

The recipe took a total of 20 minutes to throw together, even though there are three different segments.  Each part of this recipe was delicious on its own, ESPECIALLY the mushroom mixture, which was absolutely glorious. Almond flour was cooked in a mixture of butter and canola oil (I didn't have 1 pound of pork fat on hand, unfortunately) and used to saute a mixture of mushrooms.  The mushrooms are then tossed in a homemade mayonnaise and sprinkled with parsley. The mixture of earthy, nutty mushrooms, textural almond flour, creamy mayonnaise and lemony parsley is pure perfection.  

The pork terrine was firm, tender, and wonderfully spiced with the quatre epices. And finally, cherries, although canned, took very well to the pickling process and were the key to bringing this dish together. 

When Jack tasted the dish, he loved it so much, he didn't even have time to do his happy dance. Huge score in my book.  Although I do miss that dance.

Click here for the recipe.

Duo of Kobe Beef with Creamy Polenta

I prepared this over the summer as part of my Top Chef with Teanna series from Season 1, but never got around to blogging about it before the new season picked up.  But it really is a phenomenal dish, and although I had to use a flash (it was dark by the time we served it), it still is deserving of a post. 

This is a dish from season winner Harold, from the Season 1 Finale episode. Lorraine Bracco was a guest judge, and the chef's were asked to prepare a five-course dinner and pair wines from her vineyard with their dishes. This episode was at the height of Sopranos fame, although it was around that time when David Chase was doing very odd storylines where Tony Soprano did peyote in the dessert with some girl, which is not very mafia-like to me and forever changed the way "Don't Stop Believin'" was viewed forever. 

The beef was incredibly tender, and the two different textures of the short ribs and strip loin worked perfectly with one another.  The polenta was rich and creamy, but filled with butter and cheese, so I only had a bite, lest I wanted to gain five pounds just from my side dish.  

Funny side note:  I made this dish for our weekly dinners with our friends Chris and Chelsea while we were all living in DC.  Chelsea and I were talking in the kitchen as I was preparing the polenta, and I was so embarrassed when I threw in an entire stick of butter and a whole container of mascarpone cheese. No one should have to witness that.  If I'm going to eat that much butter, I'd rather not know about it. 

Luckily, the dish was a huge hit, regardless of the butter.  Tom Colicchio said in his blog post on the episode that this dish was lick the plate good.  And it was.  Hands down, this was one of my favorite dishes from the season (although I liked everything from that season, unlike this season).  It was very simple dish to make, and one that didn't require me to be in the kitchen for hours. 

Oh, and ere is an example of the poorly written Top Chef recipes from seasons past. Luckily, they have changed this and made much more comprehensive recipes.

Duo of Kobe Beef by Harold Dieterle courtesy of Top Chef

Ingredients
5 lbs. Kobe Short Ribs
2 qts. Red Wine 
1 qt. Chicken Stock 
2 qts. Veal Stock (I subbed beef stock)
2 pc Onions 
1 pc Celery 
5 pc Fresh Tomatoes 
1 cup White Polenta 
2 cups Milk 
1 cup Cream 
½ cup Butter 
½ cup Mascarpone Cheese 
2 oz. Morels 
2 oz. Asparagus Tips Blanched 
4 oz. Butter 
20 oz. Kobe Strip Loin 

Assembly:
Sear the Ribs in a Braising pot till golden brown. Add the vegetables and caramelize.  Add the red wine and reduce by ½. Then add the stocks and cover. Braise for 4 hours or until fork tender.  Remove the bones, portion into 3 inch cubes. Strain the reduced sauce and place the short rib cubes back in the sauce. 

In a sauce pot heat the cream and milk. Whisk in the white polenta. Cook on low heat for 20 minutes. Constantly stirring to avoid lumps. Add the butter and the mascarpone. Season generously. 

Heat the butter in a sauce pot, add a little drop of water and emulsifies. Place the morel and poach. Add the asparagus at the last second and season. 

Heat a sauté pan with oil and season the Strip loin heavily. Pan roast the beef on both side and place in the oven for 12 minutes. Remove from oven baste with butter and cook till med rare. Rest beef for 4 minutes and slice 
into 2 oz. pieces.

Top Chef with Teanna: Season 6, Episode 7 - Kobe Beef with Tomato-Cardomon Broth, Petit Bok Choy and Asian Pear

After some missteps with the last few Top Chef Recipes, it looks like I am back on track with this one, because this dish was GOOD.  Really, really good. Sweet, complex, flavorful, and filled with a vast mixture of ingredients that, when combined into one dish, brought together a delightful variety of flavors and textures.  

And the dish was invented by my two favorites: Kevin and Jennifer.

Sure, I love the Voltaggio brother's, too, but one of them has a Michelin star. That is like asking Tiger Woods to play golf against... me.  Ok, maybe not me, but someone who golfs a lot, like... Justin Timberlake.

I'm reaching here. It's early and I know nothing about golf. 

When I first looked at the ingredient list, I almost fainted.  All in total, there are roughly 30 ingredients required for this dish. And there are a lot of steps.  And some hard-to-find ingredients.  The main protein for the dish was a Kobe Beef skirt steak, but unfortunately, I was unable to find Kobe beef, so I had to stick with plain old skirt steak. Secondly, the dish called for sambal, a southeast Asian condiment that seems to come in several different variations that can either be spicy or sweet. Obviously I could not find this. 

Other than the extensive ingredient list and many steps, this recipe is actually quite easy to make.  Plum tomatoes are combined with ginger, garlic, star anise, fennel, cardomom, shallots, beef scraps, chicken stock and sugar to make the most incredible broth.  And when I say incredible, I mean I-want-to-drink-it-by-the-glass, which is probably the reason Jennifer won the challenge (the broth was her creation).

I marinated the strip steak in hoisin sauce, ginger, garlic, cilantro, basil, soy sauce, molasses, and orange juice. I wanted to drink that marinade after the meat was sitting in it as well, but I'm sure that would have been dangerous. 

Finally, a salad was made by blanching and shocking baby bok choy, grilling an Asian pear and cutting it into batons, shaving fennel, and supreming mandarin oranges (I had to use clementines) and tossing it in a lime-fennel vinaigrette.

Although time consuming, the dish is not very challenging and comes with a huge payoff.  

Click here for the recipe. 

On a different note, I'm very upset with the person that was sent home this week. Sure, said person annoyed me a little bit on the show, but really, that person is a far better chef than some of the remaining chefs. There is always one chef who goes home way too early (Remember Tre from Season 3? Heartbreaker.), but it always stinks. 

Top Chef with Teanna: Season 6, Episode 6 - Not Deconstructed Mole`

Please forgive the photo.  This is the first of what will be many photos with my iPhone, as my camera is in ICU and I do not have a point-and-shoot. 

So I messed up.  Big time.

This past week's Top Chef challenge asked the cheftestants to take classic dishes and deconstruct them.  I love deconstruction, and I was so excited to make whichever dish won.  Except for the one that actually won. I've never had mole` (pronouced mo-lay), and I'm wasn't even sure what it was supposed to taste like.  All I know is that mole` looks like poop on a plate.

I went on to the Bravo TV Recipe Finder and typed in Mole`.  I found Kevin's (the winner) mole` dish and went shopping for the ingredients.  Dried figs, pumpkin seeds, unsweetened chocolate, black raisins, watermelon, bananas, dried ancho chiles, pumpkin seeds, duck... you get the gist.  I had to go to three stores to find duck breast. 

Jack and I were having a friend over for dinner, so Jack suggested that I make this. I was a bit nervous, as I did not know whether or not said friend would enjoy this dish.  Although he has a fantastic palate and a taste for find foods, I was pretty sure that he wouldn't know what mole` was.  Point in fact:  Jack emailed him, saying that "Teanna is going to make a chicken mole dish from Top Chef." , when he got to my apartment, he asked "So what is chicken mole?" (pronounced mole - like Cindy Crawford). 

It didn't matter, though, because I didn't even end up making the dish.  I had started to make the mole, which was above and beyond easy. Combine all ingredients in a sauce pan and simmer for 40 minutes. Blend. Done. 

Jack sat down on the couch and asked "So, how are you going to plate it?"

"Well," I said confidently, "I will spread the mole` on the bottom of the plate, top it with the duck, then the tequila marinated watermelon, then sliced avocado, then sprinkle on some pumpkin and sunflower seeds, and then some cilantro for garnish."

"No," Jack said. "That's not what it looked like on the show.  They were all separated on the plate."

"I know, it is weird.  The presentation isn't very deconstructed to me. But that is what it looks like in the picture."

"Are you sure it wasn't the mole` he made the week before?" Jack inquired.

I paused for a long time.  "He made mole` the week before?"  I asked, afraid to hear the answer.  I hadn't really paid attention to the previous week's episode.

"Yes." he began, "It wasn't very good."

I grabbed the remote and turned on my television. I went to my DVR list, pulled up the previous episode of Top Chef. And lo and behold, it was the wrong dish.  I cursed myself.  I scrambled on to the Top Chef Recipe Finder to see if they had the deconstructed recipe posted. They didn't.  Our friend was coming over in an hour.  There was no way I was able to figure out a recipe for this dish in that amount of time. 

I had to think fast. I had $20 worth of duck breast ready to be cooked.  I decided to make a duck breast ragu` with pappardelle (which was awesome, by the way) and figure out what to do with this mole later.  

The next day, I decided to make the dish for Jack and I for dinner using chicken instead of duck. I assembled the dish as it was made during the Rancher episode and served it. The mole` really did look like poop on a plate.  Now, sometimes dishes that look like poop on a plate are delicious.  But this really was not.  It wasn't bad, per se, but it was no wonder if fell in the middle of the pack. I did love the tequila marinated watermelon, though, but otherwise, it was a very lackluster dish. I threw out the remainder of the mole, knowing I wouldn't use it again. 

I will try to conquer the winning dish this weekend and give a two-fer next week. Wish me luck.

Get the recipe here. 

And, of course, I just checked the website, and the recipe is finally up. Thanks, Bravo. 

Top Chef with Teanna - Season 6, Episode 5 - Roasted Pork Loin with Creamy Polenta and Dandelion Greens

Here it is. The winning dish from the episode.

And I can't seem to figure out why. 

Let's just say this... the rest of the dishes seemed weak. At least from the show's editor's perspectives.  The judges didn't seem to be crazy about any of the dishes.  So I guess that's why this dish won?

Or maybe it's me. Maybe I've lost my mojo.  Last week's dish was an epic fail for me, and although this isn't an epic fail, this is a "meh" fail, because I wasn't doing backflips for the dish like I usually am with the winning dishes. 

Maybe it was in the preparation.  Maybe it was the brilliant way in which Bryan Voltaggio prepared the dish. And maybe that is why he has a Michelin Star and I do not. 

But this dish seems so... simple.  Jack and I make this sort of dish all of the time when we can't figure out what else to cook.  Pork loin with polenta.  I make my polenta a bit healthier than this dish (and most polenta calls for), cooking it in chicken stock and using parmesan cheese and no butter rather than the usual whole milk/butter/mascarpone cheese combination. 

I marinated the pork in the most wonderful smoked paprika, cumin seed, rosemary, thyme, garlic and olive oil mixture.  I sauteed the dandelion greens. I made the polenta.  I glazed the turnips (meant to be rutabaga, but I couldn't find it) in a sauce of honey, chicken stock, vinegar, and sherry. I cooked the pork. I took a bite.

Nothing. 

No wow. No pizzaz. No huzzah. No HOLLAAAAAAA.  Was every other dish that bad or did I miss something in the directions?

OK.  I took a little hiatus to read the judges blogs about the dishes and gail said this of the winning dish:

Bryan’s Roasted Pork Loin, Corn Polenta, Dandelion Green & Glazed Rutabaga was definitely the highlight of our meal. It exemplified what I wish many others had done: used ingredients appropriate to the environment and cooked in a manner natural to the equipment at hand. Bryan composed the plate to showcase the pork, which was well roasted, but still juicy. The vegetables and polenta each added their own taste and texture – sweet, creamy, and just a little bitter. It was exactly what I wanted to be eating at that moment, or at any cowboy barbecue, for that matter.

Doesn't she even sound so sweet in her blog? Is Gail Simmons the nicest person on the face of the earth?  Can she be my boss?

Seriously, I'm looking for a job.  Hire me. 

So I guess I was a little unfair.  The chefs were asked to cook on a ranch, outside, in 100+ degree heat. So maybe Bryan did do the best job. And maybe I'm just bitter that Mattin and his red neckerchief will no longer be part of the show, as he was cruelly sent home for a bad dish.  But he wears a neckerchief!  Surely we could have kept him around a little longer! Did anyone see the dance he did when he won the quickfire? Why wouldn't you want to keep him around?

Click here for the recipe. And please... a moment of silence for the neckerchief. 

Top Chef with Teanna - Season 6, Episode 4 - Warm Cured Trout with Deconstructed Bernaise

I must apologize this I was Tardy for the Party on this one.  

If you didn't recognize that saying, I was giving a shoutout Kim of Real Housewives of Atlanta. Check out her song. Laugh a little.

I got off track with my scheduling a little bit on this one.  And sadly, after making about 15 winning Top Chef meals, this is my first failure.

Can I have a moment of silence for the dish?

..................

Thank you for your concern.

This was the most complicated dish I have made so far (but I haven't yet gotten to Season 2, which is chock full of Marcel's foams and gelees). The deconstructed Bernaise called for xantham gum, which by no means is a hard to find ingredient (check out Whole Foods if your supermarket doesn't have it), but I couldn't justify a $15 purchase for a teaspoon of xantham gum when I never use it otherwise.  It also called for Transglutaminase Activa RM (meat glue) to shape the fish. I was fresh out.  

Let's start from the beginning. I prepared my brine, which consisted of water, salt, orange and lemon zest, tarragon, long red peppers, sugar and coriander seeds.  This smelled like the most wonderful of wonderful brines.  There was a lot of salt, but I figured that that was just because it was curing the trout. I wanted to cure myself in it. But instead, I placed the fish in and let it cure overnight.

The next day, I started to prepare the deconstructed bernaise. And this is where everything started to take a turn.  The bernaise called for sherry vinegar, turmeric, long peppers, shallots, and chicken demiglace, which a grapeseed oil and xantham gum to be added at the end. I didn't make any chicken demiglace because I sometimes think I'm super brilliant and don't read recipes ahead of time, which always leads to mistakes.  I was also just fresh out of veal bones and chicken carcasses (I used it with my Transglutaminase Activa RM),  so I decided to use chicken stock and wing it.  And because I was not using xantham gum, I needed something to make the sauce thick. So I started off by maxing a white roux and then added the rest of the ingredients.  It worked like a charm. I was walking on air!  I was singing Nobody Gonna Break My Stride by Matthew Wilder.

Ain't nothing gonna break my stride

Nobody gonna slow me down, oh no

I got to keep on moving

Good song.

The fish was to be cooked in a cryovac bag with an aromatic cooking oil in an immersion circulator.  I could go with the "I was fresh out of cryovac bags and I still haven't unpacked my immersion circulator" thing, but I fear that joke just got old.  So instead, I decided to bake the fish in a 425 oven for 15 minutes, which obviously changed the texture of the fish.  But that was not the problem. The problem was that I completely forgot the aromatic cooking oil (seriously, I didn't realize that I didn't do it until I just referred to the recipe right now) which consisted of orange and lemon zests, tarragon, long red peppers, olive oil, shallots, coriander and fennel seeds.  Listen to all of those flavors, people!  I wasn't even Tardy for the Party on this one! I just didn't show up!

The dish called for pommes souffle. In case you do not know the method to cooking pommes souffle, I'm gonna break it down.  Two pots of oil:  one at 275 degrees, the other at 380 degrees, in this case. Take some thinly sliced potatoes (1/16 of an inch), put them in the first pot and wait for the pot to BUBBLE OVER and then place them in the second pot until they puff up.  

I'm all about setting fires in my kitchen, but it is often not on purpose. So I decided to make shoestring potato chips by using a julienne slicer and frying the potatoes. 

I was excited to try the dish. I plated all of my ingredients, took some photos in the quickly setting light, and took a bite. 

SALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLT!

I mean, SO MUCH SALT that I had to spit it out.  Like Padma spit out Arianne's dish last year! Like Kathy Lee Gifford spit out Jeff's dish last year!  Like Teanna spit out her own dish yesterday! 

Like, my heart started pounding and my blood pressure rose, I'm-not-even-kidding-you salty.

Which was a shame, because the fish smelled SO good. Of tarragon and orange and coriander.  And the deconstructed bernaise was so interesting and tasty. And my chips were awesome.

So what did I do wrong?  Did I accidentally use too much salt in the brine?  I did cut the recipe in half, so maybe I accidentally put the whole amount of salt listed in the recipe in. Was it the fact that I forgot the aromatic cooking oil? Where did I go wrong? Tom Colicchio, I need your help!

This dish was definitely on the more challenging side of any dish I have made so far, but even after all of my problems, I wouldn't say that it was impossible.  It actually was very easy to simplify.  

Scary Scale (out of ten): 7

Would I make it again?  I'll let you know when my salt headache goes away. 

Warm Cured Trout adapted from Brian Voltaggio and Mike Isabella

12 Servings

INGREDIENTS

6 (½ lb portions) trout filets

For Brine

300 ml water

100g salt

50g sugar

10g coriander seeds

10g fennel seeds

2 long peppers

5 fresh tarragon stems with leaves

¼ bay leaf

1 orange, zested

1 lemon, zested

For Reduction Sauce/Base

3 tablespoons flour

2 tablespoons butter

350 ml sherry vinegar

8 fresh tarragon stems with leaves

2 long peppers

2 shallots, sliced

20g turmeric

½ cup chicken stock

350ml grapeseed oil

For Shallot Garnish

¼ cup minced Shallots

1 ½ cups Verjus (or 3 pints Port + 1 pint Red Wine Vinegar)

For Julienned Potatoes

1 Russet Potato, sliced into julienne

Cooking Oil

 

DIRECTIONS

For Trout:

Dust trout with transglutaminase and attach filets flesh to flesh head to tail to make 3 cylinders. Roll tightly in plastic wrap.

While trout sits in refrigerator for 35-40 minutes to set shape, make brine by mixing ingredients together and completely dissolving salt and sugar. Cool down.

Combine ingredients for cooking oil and heat to make aromatic oil.

Preheat oven to 350.  Place trout filet in oven and bake for 15 minutes.

For Reduction/Sauce Base:

Combine ingredients except grapeseed oil. Reduce to a third of the original volume.

Add grapeseed oil right before plating.

For Shallot Garnish:

Combine ingredients for shallot mixture and reduce until the shallots are al dente.

Strain out shallots and reduce the liquid to au sec. Coat shallots with reduction.

For Julienned Potato Chips:

Heat oil to 380 F.  Fry until golden brown, about 4 minutes. Remove from oil, season with salt salt.

To Serve:

Place trout on plate.

Spoon warm béarnaise sauce on the side.

Place garnishes in the sauce.

Rest potato chips on trout.